Handy
"Weird Al" Yankovic"Handy" is a song by "Weird Al" Yankovic, released in 2014 in the Pop genre. The song is 2:47 long and contains 52 lines and 405 words.
Lyrics
0:08First things first I'm a craftsman
0:11Remodelling is my only passion
0:13And I'm the greatest in the business
0:14Want referrals yo
0:16My clientele will bear you witness
0:18I can help when your door jamb sticks
0:20There is nothing in the world I can't fix
0:23I do tiles I do stone I do bricks
0:25Call me I'll come rushing over with my bag of tricks
0:28Where you go when your disposal is rusted
0:30Termite problem making you disgusted
0:33When your front window is busted
0:35Just one man that's always trusted
0:37I'm so handy you already know
0:42I'll fix your plumbing when your toilets over flows
0:47I'm so handy I'll bring you up to code
0:52When your dishwasher's about to explode
0:57Now you see that your furnace is needing some service
1:00I'm fully bonded no need to be nervous
1:02Perhaps you would like a new counter Formica
1:05Maybe I'll hook up your dish washer combo dryer
1:07But all your pipes are antique
1:08Your water pressure's too weak
1:09You got an attic full of dry rot
1:11Because your roof sprung a leak
1:12Your fridge is starting to reek
1:13Your hardwood floors really squeak
1:14But don't you worry I'll just show you my amazing technique
1:17Now let me glue that glue that and screw that screw that
1:20Any random chore you got well I can do that do that
1:22Or maybe I'll just rewire your house for fun
1:24I got 99 problems but a switch ain't one
1:27I'm so handy everyone said so
1:32I'll grout your bathroom resurface your patio
1:37I'm so handy I'm the guy to know
1:42When your leaf blower doesn't blow-oh-oh-oh
1:47Patch the drywall clean your gutters and mow the lawn
1:52Make that phone call I'll install anything you want
1:57Yeah check my big staple gun my socket wrenches are second to none
2:02I won't quit 'til I'm done don't even care if I hammer my thumb
2:13Still rocking my screwdriver
2:15Got the whole world thinking I'm MacGuyver
2:18Your heating bills are shocking
2:20I can solve that with some duct tape and some caulking
2:23Your house is a disaster huh
2:25Need a guy whose a master with the plaster huh
2:28Let me be your stripper
2:30Taking off lacquer no one does it quicker
2:32I'm so handy you already know
2:37I'll beat all price quotes my hourly rates are low
2:42I'm so handy you should call this pro
2:47I'm in the phone book and se habla Español
First things first I'm a craftsman Remodelling is my only passion And I'm the greatest in the business Want referrals yo My clientele will bear you witness I can help when your door jamb sticks There is nothing in the world I can't fix I do tiles I do stone I do bricks Call me I'll come rushing over with my bag of tricks Where you go when your disposal is rusted Termite problem making you disgusted When your front window is busted Just one man that's always trusted I'm so handy you already know I'll fix your plumbing when your toilets over flows I'm so handy I'll bring you up to code When your dishwasher's about to explode Now you see that your furnace is needing some service I'm fully bonded no need to be nervous Perhaps you would like a new counter Formica Maybe I'll hook up your dish washer combo dryer But all your pipes are antique Your water pressure's too weak You got an attic full of dry rot Because your roof sprung a leak Your fridge is starting to reek Your hardwood floors really squeak But don't you worry I'll just show you my amazing technique Now let me glue that glue that and screw that screw that Any random chore you got well I can do that do that Or maybe I'll just rewire your house for fun I got 99 problems but a switch ain't one I'm so handy everyone said so I'll grout your bathroom resurface your patio I'm so handy I'm the guy to know When your leaf blower doesn't blow-oh-oh-oh Patch the drywall clean your gutters and mow the lawn Make that phone call I'll install anything you want Yeah check my big staple gun my socket wrenches are second to none I won't quit 'til I'm done don't even care if I hammer my thumb Still rocking my screwdriver Got the whole world thinking I'm MacGuyver Your heating bills are shocking I can solve that with some duct tape and some caulking Your house is a disaster huh Need a guy whose a master with the plaster huh Let me be your stripper Taking off lacquer no one does it quicker I'm so handy you already know I'll beat all price quotes my hourly rates are low I'm so handy you should call this pro I'm in the phone book and se habla Español
Translation
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