Word Crimes
"Weird Al" Yankovic"Word Crimes" is a song by "Weird Al" Yankovic, released in 2014 in the Pop genre. The song is 3:38 long and contains 113 lines and 498 words.
Lyrics
0:01Everybody shut up WOO
0:09Everyone listen up
0:11Hey hey hey uh
0:13Hey hey hey
0:18If you can't write in the proper way
0:22If you don't know how to conjugate
0:26Maybe you flunked that class
0:28And maybe now you find
0:29That people mock you online
0:33Okay now here's the deal
0:35I'll try to educate ya
0:37Gonna familiarize
0:39You with the nomenclature
0:41You'll learn the definitions
0:43Of nouns and prepositions
0:45Literacy's your mission
0:47And that's why I think it's a
0:49Good time
0:51To learn some grammar
0:53Now did I stammer
0:55Work on that grammar
0:56You should know when
0:59It's "less" or it's "fewer"
1:01Like people who were
1:03Never raised in a sewer
1:04I hate these word crimes
1:07Like I could care less
1:09That means you do care
1:11At least a little
1:12Don't be a moron
1:15You'd better slow down
1:17And use the right pronoun
1:19Show the world you're no clown
1:20Everybody wise up
1:20Say you got an "I" "T"
1:22Followed by apostrophe "s"
1:25Now what does that mean
1:26You would not use
1:27"it's" in this case
1:29As a possessive
1:30It's a contraction
1:32What's a contraction
1:34Well it's the shortening of a word
1:35Or a group of words
1:35By the omission of a sound or letter
1:37Okay now here's some notes
1:38Syntax you're always mangling
1:40No "x" in "espresso"
1:42Your participle's danglin'
1:44But I don't want your drama
1:46If you really wanna
1:48Leave out that Oxford comma
1:50Just keep in mind
1:51That "be" "see" "are" "you"
1:54Are words not letters
1:56Get it together
1:58Use your spellchecker
1:59You should never
2:02Write words using numbers
2:04Unless you're seven
2:06Or your name is Prince
2:07I hate these word crimes
2:10You really need a
2:12Full time proofreader
2:13You dumb mouth-breather
2:15Well you should hire
2:18Some cunning linguist
2:19To help you distinguish
2:22What is proper English
2:24One thing I ask of you
2:25Time to learn your homophones
2:26Is past due
2:27Learn to diagram a sentence too
2:29Always say "to whom"
2:30Don't ever say "to who"
2:31And listen up when I tell you this
2:33I hope you never use quotation
2:34Marks for emphasis
2:35You finished second grade
2:36I hope you can tell
2:37If you're doing good or doing well
2:39About better figure out the difference
2:41Irony is not coincidence
2:42And I thought that you'd gotten it
2:44Through your skull
2:44What's figurative and what's literal
2:47Oh but just now you said
2:49You literally couldn't get out of bed
2:51That really makes me want to literally
2:52Smack a crowbar upside
2:53Your stupid head
2:54I read your e-mail
2:57It's quite apparent
2:59Your grammar's errant
3:01You're incoherent
3:02Saw your blog post
3:05It's really fantastic
3:07That was sarcastic
3:08(Oh psych )
3:09'Cause you write like a spastic
3:10I hate these Word Crimes
3:13Your prose is dopey
3:15Think you should only
3:17Write in emoji
3:18Oh you're a lost cause
3:21Go back to pre-school
3:22Get out of the gene pool
3:24Try your best to not drool
3:27Never mind I give up
3:32Really now I give up
3:34Hey hey hey
3:36Hey hey hey
3:38Go Away
Everybody shut up WOO Everyone listen up Hey hey hey uh Hey hey hey If you can't write in the proper way If you don't know how to conjugate Maybe you flunked that class And maybe now you find That people mock you online Okay now here's the deal I'll try to educate ya Gonna familiarize You with the nomenclature You'll learn the definitions Of nouns and prepositions Literacy's your mission And that's why I think it's a Good time To learn some grammar Now did I stammer Work on that grammar You should know when It's "less" or it's "fewer" Like people who were Never raised in a sewer I hate these word crimes Like I could care less That means you do care At least a little Don't be a moron You'd better slow down And use the right pronoun Show the world you're no clown Everybody wise up Say you got an "I" "T" Followed by apostrophe "s" Now what does that mean You would not use "it's" in this case As a possessive It's a contraction What's a contraction Well it's the shortening of a word Or a group of words By the omission of a sound or letter Okay now here's some notes Syntax you're always mangling No "x" in "espresso" Your participle's danglin' But I don't want your drama If you really wanna Leave out that Oxford comma Just keep in mind That "be" "see" "are" "you" Are words not letters Get it together Use your spellchecker You should never Write words using numbers Unless you're seven Or your name is Prince I hate these word crimes You really need a Full time proofreader You dumb mouth-breather Well you should hire Some cunning linguist To help you distinguish What is proper English One thing I ask of you Time to learn your homophones Is past due Learn to diagram a sentence too Always say "to whom" Don't ever say "to who" And listen up when I tell you this I hope you never use quotation Marks for emphasis You finished second grade I hope you can tell If you're doing good or doing well About better figure out the difference Irony is not coincidence And I thought that you'd gotten it Through your skull What's figurative and what's literal Oh but just now you said You literally couldn't get out of bed That really makes me want to literally Smack a crowbar upside Your stupid head I read your e-mail It's quite apparent Your grammar's errant You're incoherent Saw your blog post It's really fantastic That was sarcastic (Oh psych ) 'Cause you write like a spastic I hate these Word Crimes Your prose is dopey Think you should only Write in emoji Oh you're a lost cause Go back to pre-school Get out of the gene pool Try your best to not drool Never mind I give up Really now I give up Hey hey hey Hey hey hey Go Away
Translation
Select a language to see the translated lyrics.