Pirelli's Miracle Elixir
Stephen Sondheim"Pirelli's Miracle Elixir" is a song by Stephen Sondheim, released in 2007 in the Pop genre. The song is 2:57 long and contains 79 lines and 416 words.
Lyrics
0:01Ladies and gentlemen
0:03May I have your attention please
0:07Do you wake every morning in shame and despair
0:09To discover your pillow is covered with hair
0:13What ought not to be there
0:15Well ladies and gentlemen
0:17From now on you can waken with ease
0:19You need never again have a worry or care
0:21I will show you a miracle marvelous rare
0:25Gentlemen you are about to see something that rose from the dead
0:33On the top of my head
0:39Scarcely a month ago gentlemen
0:40I was suddenly struck with a rare oriental disease
0:45Though the finest physicians in london were called
0:47I awakened one morning amazed and appalled
0:49To discover with dread that my head was as bald
0:51As a novice's knees
0:53I was dying of shame
0:55Till a gentleman came
0:57An illustrious barber pirelli by name
1:04He gave me a liquid as precious as gold
1:08I rubbed it in daily like what I was told
1:12And behold
1:17Only thirty days old
1:23'Twas pirelli's miracle elixir
1:27That's what did the trick sir
1:29True sir true
1:31Was it quick sir
1:33Did it in a tick sir
1:34Just like an elixir ought to do
1:39How about a bottle mister
1:41Only costs a penny guaranteed
1:43Penny buys a bottle I don't know
1:45You don't need ah let's go
1:46Does pirelli's stimulate the growth sir
1:49You can have my oath sir
1:51'Tis unique
1:53Rub a minute
1:55Stimulating in'it
1:57Soon you'll have to thin it
1:59Once a week
2:00Gently dab it gets to be a 'abit
2:04Soon there'll be enough sir
2:06Somebody can grab it
2:08See this chap with hair like shelley's
2:12You can tell he's used pirelli's
2:16Let me have a bottle
2:17Make that two
2:17Pardon me ma'am what's that awful stench
2:19Are we standing near an open trench
2:23Buy pirelli's miracle elixir
2:26Anything what's slick sir
2:28Soon sprouts curls
2:30Try pirelli's
2:31When they see how thick sir
2:33You can have your pick sir
2:35Of the girls
2:37See pirelli's miracle elixir
2:39Grow a little wick sir
2:40Then some fuzz
2:41The pirelli's
2:41Soon'll make it thick sir
2:42Like a good elixir
2:43Always does
2:44Trust pirelli's
2:45If your hair is sick sir
2:46Fix it in the nick sir
2:47Don't look grim
2:48Just pirelli's miracle elixir
2:49That'll do the trick sir
2:50What about the money
2:51If you've got it a kick sir
2:53What about the money
2:53Where is this pirelli
2:54Go and get pirelli
2:55Tell it to the mixer
2:56Of the miracle elixir
2:56If you've got a kick sir
2:57What about the money
Ladies and gentlemen May I have your attention please Do you wake every morning in shame and despair To discover your pillow is covered with hair What ought not to be there Well ladies and gentlemen From now on you can waken with ease You need never again have a worry or care I will show you a miracle marvelous rare Gentlemen you are about to see something that rose from the dead On the top of my head Scarcely a month ago gentlemen I was suddenly struck with a rare oriental disease Though the finest physicians in london were called I awakened one morning amazed and appalled To discover with dread that my head was as bald As a novice's knees I was dying of shame Till a gentleman came An illustrious barber pirelli by name He gave me a liquid as precious as gold I rubbed it in daily like what I was told And behold Only thirty days old 'Twas pirelli's miracle elixir That's what did the trick sir True sir true Was it quick sir Did it in a tick sir Just like an elixir ought to do How about a bottle mister Only costs a penny guaranteed Penny buys a bottle I don't know You don't need ah let's go Does pirelli's stimulate the growth sir You can have my oath sir 'Tis unique Rub a minute Stimulating in'it Soon you'll have to thin it Once a week Gently dab it gets to be a 'abit Soon there'll be enough sir Somebody can grab it See this chap with hair like shelley's You can tell he's used pirelli's Let me have a bottle Make that two Pardon me ma'am what's that awful stench Are we standing near an open trench Buy pirelli's miracle elixir Anything what's slick sir Soon sprouts curls Try pirelli's When they see how thick sir You can have your pick sir Of the girls See pirelli's miracle elixir Grow a little wick sir Then some fuzz The pirelli's Soon'll make it thick sir Like a good elixir Always does Trust pirelli's If your hair is sick sir Fix it in the nick sir Don't look grim Just pirelli's miracle elixir That'll do the trick sir What about the money If you've got it a kick sir What about the money Where is this pirelli Go and get pirelli Tell it to the mixer Of the miracle elixir If you've got a kick sir What about the money
Translation
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