Lotus (Explicit)

My halo
Tried to punish me
From troubled mind I came to find
The waters were never sweet
Paranoia got me looking out the window
Mood might change depending on how the wind blow
When I was young no one told me health ain't always physical
Looking around I ain't no different from my kinfolk
I pray we heal with words who Jah bless no man can curse
I pray that I'm a vessel and I stay giving all I've learned
If self loves means putting me first
It's the greatest love story on earth
In my pain is a glory
You kept tryna control me
But your God isn't for me
So I'll be moving on
In your head you forsake me
But my heart isn't breaking
And like dew from a flower
I see the break of dawn
Open fire all my life a fighter
Dropped out of college still I
Made it through the wire
Betting on myself to take me higher
I'm the supplier
A thousand mini deaths within
All black attire
You brought that woman to a low
I might amplify her
It's more than evident I know
I'm what they desire
Can't tell you what the future holds or the day I'll retire
They tell me "Simbi it's in your hands" you're preaching to the choir
To get your voice heard I guess
Takes some finesse
This music **** one big game
I'm playing chess
They want me speak on world issues on the internet
But that not how I speak my truth or the way I express
You ain't got a clue how I feel
And what I suppress
So when you're in the public eye
I wanna see your best
I been saying the world's ****** from when I was twelve
So don't tell me what I should be speaking on if you ain't changed yourselves
My pen has always been respected
I'm still connected
And when I write it's introspective
Somewhat subjective
I'm not sure who you think I am
Or what you're expecting
But I been human all my life
So please accept it
You live your life on your screen
Your mind's congested
You don't know what it is I see
And how I'm affected
So quit acting like the world I've been neglecting
I chose to keep myself protected
You remain infected
Acting like I did a crime
You want me arrested
If I'm not good enough for you
Then stop investing
It's not by force you should listen
I don't expect it
But I won't tolerate a lie
Or be disrespected
Yo I am not your damn puppet your prodigy
Sometimes I can't believe the nerve the hypocrisy
I'm not responsible for the world in all honesty
All I can do is better myself that's my prophecy my prophecy yeah
If we're getting high tonight
It's gonna be a long night
It's gonna be a long night
Underneath the sky we fly high
I was always hiding
Now I'm on a mountain
Rest assured your voice is heard I'm here listening
But I don't wanna hear about no talk about you giving in
It's ok having a moment of weakness when your low
But you're the strongest person I know you know
You know
In my pain is a glory
You kept tryna control me
But your God isn't for me
So I'll be moving on
In your head you forsake me
But my heart isn't breaking
And like dew from a flower
I see the break of dawn
If we're getting high tonight
It's gonna be a long night
It's gonna be a long night
Underneath the sky we fly high
I was always hiding
Now I'm on a mountain