Mephesto And Kevin / South Park Theme (Instrumental|Explicit)

Mephesto And Kevin - Primus
In 1986 the university of California at Davis
Saw two of its all time brightest stars
Dr Alphonse Mephisto and Dr Arnie Apesacrappin
Dr Mephisto worked hard towards his thesis his goal
Was to genetically duplicate the DNA structure of asparagus
So that all asparagus would grow to the same girth and length
Giving asparagus a much more pleasant presentation in the world's
Supermarket vegetable bins
Dr Apesacrappin's goal was to genetically create the greatest
Musical entertainer the world had ever seen
Dr Apesacrappin knew that if he could assemble the right elements
He could theoretically build a DNA structure that would ensure
His creation had talent far surpassing the average individual
At the time one subject of urban myth was the story that
Michael Jackson in an effort to maintain his youthful look and
Feminine vocal characteristics had his testicles surgically removed
Thereby making him a modern day castrato
If such a rumor were true Michael Jackson more than likely would have
Had some of his semen preserved before the surgery to ensure the
Future of his name and lineage
Word came back to
Dr Apesacrappin of a secret cold storage locker
Deep within the bowels of the UCLA research center that not only
Contained four containers of frozen semen but also held a pair of
Testicles each was labeled with the name Jack Michaelson
I once heard a noise
In the night the most sensual voice
Song of love from an angelic boy
Stuck in my head
And this is what he said
I am gopher boy
Pondering reality
I am gopher boy
Who will buy my raspberries
This had to be the seed of the king of pop
Dr Apesacrappin was able to use his charm and chiseled Greek
Features to woo a young lab technician by the name of Jennifer who of
Course just happened to have the proper access needed to obtain a small vial
Of the precious semen
The search for the egg was a short one Dr Mephisto simply ran an ad
In the classified section of an LA music magazine the ad read
Wanted unfertilized human eggs for genetic experiment donors must
Have musical background with a plethora of young eager wanna be
Musical starlets willing to sell their eggs the two doctors after
Rigorous auditioning picked and purchased
Dr Apesacrappin felt that it would be far less complicated legally if the
Fetus were brought to term
In the womb of a non human he had long since
Secured the services of the university volleyball mascot a llama by the
Name of Missy
When the baby was ready
The child was removed via cesarean it was a healthy baby
Boy he was named Kevin
I once heard a noise
In the night the most sensual voice
Song of love from an angelic boy
Stuck in my head
And this is what he said
I am gopher boy
Pondering reality
I am gopher boy
Who will buy my raspberries
Kevin was a beautiful child Dr Apesacrappin saw to it that Kevin was
Trained by the best in all aspects of performing
His voice was golden and had a
Sweetness to it that most males lacked he moved with grace and was able to
Moonwalk by the time he was three as Kevin grew with his talent Dr Apesacrappin
Started noticing odd developments in his physical state when Kevin lost his baby
Teeth his secondaries came in with a vengeance they were at least twice
The size of a normal adult's
And the two in front stuck nearly straight out also
As Kevin reached his eighth year
He was the same height as he was when he was four to
Top it off he was growing hair all over
And his penis was enormous even by adult
Standards
It also dawned on the doctor
That even through all the years of hearing Kevin sing
He rarely spoke often choosing to communicate with various grunts and gurgles
I once heard a noise
In the night the most sensual voice
Song of love from an angelic boy
Stuck in my head
And this is what he said
I am gopher boy
Pondering reality
I am gopher boy
Who will buy my raspberries
Others were noticing the changes in Kevin children began to tease him
To call him gopher boy
One day a bully by the name of big Roy started throwing bananas at him
Soon a crowd of kids were all throwing bananas
Suddenly in a fury Kevin rushed at big Roy
And bit three fingers off on his left hand
Kevin was taken away and placed in the custody of the state
Dr Apesacrappin's actions were found out but because there was no legislation
Concerning the genetic construction of another human being
No criminal charges were brought forth
The medical association's board of ethics stripped him of all his credentials
And his reputation was ruined
In fact his name became so synonymous with failure that for years to come
Med students around the world were known to say in times of mishaps
Damn I feel just like Apesacrappin
Dr Mephisto immediately began proceedings to adopt little Kevin
Being a noted scientist and the creator of the cloned asparagus
It wasn't long before the two were legally united as father and son
They moved to Colorado where they live in relative obscurity
Kevin is still a boy of few spoken words
Sticking mainly to his grunts and gurgles
But on occasion if you listen closely
You can hear his sweet golden signing voice ring out
Into the night over the small town of south park
I am gopher boy
Pondering reality
I am gopher boy
Who will buy my raspberries