death sentence (Explicit)

i talked to them about the necessity
of having some creativity
of your own involved in your life,
and how that can provide you an escape
from the death sentence of your normal role
in society that's mapped out for you.
and i told them that sort of
what i've tried to do with my life is basically...
you know,
my life for me began one day in high school when i thought,
i don't care what anybody thinks of me
or how much money i have or anything,
i just wanna get out of here.
you know,
i'm not going to wear a tight collar all my life
unless i'm in the mood...
sort of thing.
and i just sort of talked about the obstacles
that can get in the way of letting a person
who just wants to live their own life,
such as financial insecurity,
cultural isolation,
especially in the suburbs,
you know,
people just get out of their cushy little boxes
in the suburbs and kinda die.
i just feel out of the grid,
the grid of the world. you know,
the imposed structure that's the giant voice
that tells you 'good morning! it's 630 am!
time to get up and listen to the crap-all-over-it show
with whoever the f**k he is, telling me more bullshit!'
i like to get out. but no, i do a little...
you know,
i just try to keep loose;
go to bed at night, eat right, mess around,
little tai-chi maybe a few minutes,
go for a swim...
one last question
are you an optimist,
would you say neither optimist or pessimist,
just kinda neutral as far as all that sort of thing goes.
i don't think much about that.
it's gonna go well or badly,
if i think i wanna do it
i'll just do it.