Forever (Explicit)

Yo
I know you don't understand my words but you will eventually
You will eventually
Some day
One day
I know you don't understand my words but you will eventually
And when you get older I hope you don't hold this s**t against me
I hope you understand I love you more than life itself
And this is nothin' but your daddy's thoughts when he was feelin' empty
And everything ain't always what it seems like on the outside
I fought so many tears so that you would never see the outcry
I never wanted kids until I lived and went through hard times
And became a man that fell in love with someone that my heart finds
But you know how that s**t go
Young and reckless
Different women part time
And I wasn't ready for that life yet
I was in my dark prime
Me and your moms ain't get along and she gave me a hard time
I really think that we just crossed paths at the wrong time
I wasn't happy when she said she was pregnant
Probably the worst news of my life
That s**t was so depressing
I told her she should get an abortion and I really meant it
I'm sorry that I said that s**t
Yo I was trippin'
I know you don't understand my words but you will eventually
And when you get older I hope you don't hold this s**t against me
I'm sorry
Yo
And I never wanted a broken home to raise you from a distance
Yeah I'll admit it
I was scared of that type of commitment
Even hopes of a miscarriage
Anything bad that could happen
That'd get me out of that situation
I was livid
I felt like s**t about my thoughts
That wasn't me
I'm different
Plus I was dealing with some demons that I couldn't live with
I told her she should get an abortion and I really meant it
I know you don't understand my words but you will eventually
And when you get older I hope you don't hold this s**t against me
Hope you don't hate me
I was selfish
I hope you forgive me
Hope you forgive me
And I still remember your baby shower like it was yesterday
And to your mom it was special
Me
Just another day
I wish that you could see the pictures
All the fake phony smilin'
Had to pretend that I was happy
Deep down I was cryin'
Ma asked if I was okay
I turned around and looked away
I was dryin' all my tears
Look back to say yeah
I was lyin'
Godd**n
How the hell I get here
This is it
This supposed to be my life
This ain't how I pictured it
I never felt so d**n alone
But it was more than often
One of the worst days of my life
And I ain't even lyin'
We argued when we came home
I blame myself for all this
I think that I was holding a grudge 'cause she ain't get an abortion
I'm sorry
D**n
And I know you can't understand my words but you will eventually
And when you get older I hope you don't hold this s**t against me
I can't believe I tried to hurt you
I hope you forgive me
Please
Please
And everything ain't always what it seems like on the outside
I fight so many tears so that you would never see the outcry
I sacrifice my life so you could live it
Peace
Want to give you things my father couldn't give to
Me
I think I was raised wrong
And that's just what it is to me
And if you ask him then his a*s gon' probably disagree
But whatever
Whatever
And nothing's ever made me cry as much as you
I swear
Your smile gives me motivation and some new ideas
My worst fear is always you not knowing who I am
'Cause I been on the road dreamchasing for you out here
I was the first thing that you opened your eyes to
And the last one that you said goodnight to
I went home and cried to
And I bawled my eyes out
And then watched you
Glad I got you
That's a blatant fact
And every negative thing I said I swear I take it back
I know you don't understand my words but you will eventually
And when you get older I hope you don't hold this s**t against me
I hope you understand I love you more than I love myself
And this is nothin' but your daddy's thoughts when he was feelin' empty
I was feelin' empty
I been feelin' empty
I put my emotions in this music when I'm feelin' empty
I hope you forgive me
Please
Please